I remember my mother telling me the difference between extrovert and introvert. I was stumped by a homework assignment because I had no idea what they meant.
After her explanation, I responded, "Oh, I'm an introvert."
Her reply: "Gina, you are the most extroverted person I know."
I remember having to go to the auditorium to watch "A Tale of Two Cities" in English class. I sat in the front row - all alone - so I could see and hear. The teacher came up, put her arm around my shoulders and said, "Gina, you're such a lone wolf."
I remember telling a cousin how difficult it is to cope with being ridiculously shy. She laughed and said, "You are not shy!"
It took me a while to sort out all these mixed messages, but I did. I AM shy - painfully so. As an adult: I have never called a friend and said "Hey, let's go out for a drink." I have never called a relative to invite them over. I have never called anyone to ask if I could visit them. I have never stopped a stranger to ask the time. If I need help of any other kind, forget it. I figure out a way to do it myself.
However, when I have a visitor I can talk a blue streak. Riding in a car, I feel compelled to keep up a line of chatter with those around me. I'm fairly well educated and very well read, so I have an amazing number of topics I can discuss. As long as there are people around me who are not total strangers, I can interact and have fun.
I have learned that as long as people come to me I am very warm, very open, and I love to talk... as long as people come to me. My problem is in approaching people. Even people I have known all my life terrify me. My friends and family have no idea that this problem exists. They see me as very amiable and outgoing, yet they wonder why I am such a "homebody".
I just wanted to say that people who seem extroverted on the surface may indeed be shy to the point of neurosis. If you have a friend who never calls or writes you without prompting, keep your calls and letters going. That person may not be intentionally snubbing you. If you have a friend you suspect of being shy, invite that person to be with you and don't worry about reciprocal invitations. Just be a friend and you will find that you can call on that person for anything.:)
